One of our clients was recently appointed as the head of a tough and demanding business.  His selection was a surprise as many “rules” were broken to give him the position.  Our client was excited when he was appointed.  He was confident and clear on the changes he planned to make to support the business in stepping into its new strategy. 5 weeks into the new position, he noticed that self-doubt had crept in.  In fact, he had pushed his mandate aside and focus was being placed on “aligning to the new environment”. 

More than ever, his need for self-management was highlighted. 

The definition of self-management is “the art of being the best of yourself despite all the complexities you face” (Walter Vandervelde).  Yet, when faced with significant changes and the complexities that come with change, the default is to look at the external environment, identify where we aren’t aligning and to try to amend ourselves to “fit in” or “make it work”.  We forget why we were selected for the role in the first place.  We also forget that in any situation, change provides us with the opportunity to improve an environment as we bring fresh perspective and insight into the space.  When we change ourselves too dramatically to “fit in”, the necessary levelling up and improvement that we were chosen to facilitate is delayed and often lost. 

So how do we self-manage ourselves when there is incredible pressure from the external environment to conform so the environment (and the people in it) don’t have to change? 

The starting point is to remind ourselves of “WHY”. 

1. Why was I chosen?
2. Why did they want ME for this role (what is it about me that they felt the environment needed)?
3. What is it about me that I can rely on, no matter what? (we ask our clients to identify 3 words that describe them best – not what they do but who they are)

Remembering “who we are” is critical to self-manage.  Especially when the environment is asking us to change so it doesn’t have to.  How else can we know that we are being the best of ourselves?

Once we have reminded ourselves of who we are, we need to highlight the change we are responsible for making.  This helps us to prepare ourselves for the resistance.  It helps us to anticipate and prepare for the push back and challenge.  It also provides us with the opportunity to have empathy and yet confidence that we are moving in the right direction.  Even the most healthiest business environments have opportunities for improvement.  Even the most change resilient environments will experience resistance. 

Finally, it is important to be flexible and curious as we lead towards our expectations.  We will also grow and change as we evolve to work within the new environment.  Some conflict is to be expected. Remaining confident and true to who we are allows us to DO things differently while remaining true to who we are and what we are leading the team towards.

If we find this process difficult as the executives and leaders of businesses, imagine the pressure our middle managers experience when going through the change.  As Leaders, be firm, clear and empathetic.

In times of significant change, it’s not just our strategies or actions that matter—it’s who we are at our core that carries the most weight. When we lead from a place of authenticity, grounded in our unique strengths and purpose, we offer a powerful example to those around us—especially our middle managers. They look to us not only for direction, but for inspiration on how to navigate complexity without losing themselves. When we consistently show up as the best version of ourselves, we create space for others to do the same. And in doing so, we don’t just manage change—we lead meaningful transformation. Let who you are speak louder than what you do.